"The Pride of Wessexshire" All the latest news and rumours on Wessex Wanderers FC.
I can play a good through ball
Viva-roll!
Football is our heart and soul
That’s right!
We’ll be so good for you!
See the full lyrics here…
Wessex superstar Ben Pocock was sensationally accused of being a member of notorious ‘Babyface Gang’ in this weekends edition of the Sun newspaper.
Club officials have reacted angrily to story and quickly released the following statement: “It appeared in the Sun, so of course it’s bullsh*t, everyone knows Bonje isn’t 15!”
Flay is Kung fu fighting,
He’s fast as lightning,
And he’s a little bit frightening!
Having missed last weekends match with a sore spud, Wessex Wanderers are concerned that going under the knife may be the only option to clear up the players long standing nut niggle.
Surgery would deprive the team of the speedy defenders services for several weeks and would only be sanctioned as a last resort.
As Wessex star Jamie Lewis let fame go to his head? Reports suggest the Wessex No. 7 as been living the superstar lifestyle since his one sentence write-up on the front cover of Tuesday’s Evening Post’s ‘Grassroots’ pull-out.
Chairwoman Lyn Hughes as confirmed Jim’s new agent Max Clifford as requested this weekends game is put back to a 3 o’clock kick-off to allow his client time to get a spray tan, manicure and facial!
Fans favourite Jimmy Saville on tour.
Rob Pring may have made a big impact already in his short Wessex career, but this latest snap from Jimmy Zooom suggest Rob could also be the smallest footballer ever!
Wessex No. 14 Mark Hooper decided he would pay tribute to the famous ‘Rumble in the Jungle’ last night when he decided to take on the whole Rhubarb Athletic squad single handedly.
An onlooker said “Mark obviously took offence at some bad sportsmanship at the final whistle and he went all Muhammad Ali crazy on their asses”.
Aussie superstar Jarrod “Toadfish” Rebecchi pays tribute to his favourite football team Wessex Wanderers, in the 1st edition of the Wessex Celebrity Fan Club.
The Wessex Daily Press was there to expose Jamie Carnevale’s evil toothbrush fetish. In response the Wessex No.9 said “Wheres my toothbrush?…ehh that’s sick!”
If you have any stories or photos to share please email them to wdp@wessexwanderers.co.uk
